Usually when we use the word ‘stress’ we’re referring to so-called ‘bad’ stress or DIStress. But did you know there is a name for good stress? Eustress, pronounced YOU-stress, is a term coined by endocrinologist Hans Selye who studied the impact of stress on the mind and body. Eu comes from the Greek meaning well or good and suggests that there is indeed such a thing as healthy stress.
So, What Is Eustress and Why is it Important?
Well, without eustress we are not equipped to deal with excitement and/or challenge in our lives.
It’s eustress that fuels our successes Read More…
Often when our clients say “I don’t know”, they really do know – they’re just unwilling to acknowledge or face the answer. If it was was easy to say aloud they would have done so. There can be many reasons for the “I don’t know”, but if we trust our instincts and explore gently – we may just be rewarded with an Aha moment!
There are any number of reasons for that, “I don’t know” – but most of them are probably a fear of the consequences of stating that answer aloud. Maybe it means they will need to acknowledge Read More…
Whether you’re a coach, counselor, therapist or social worker, affirmative writing is a great exercise to offer your clients who are making changes and attempting to bridge the gap from where they are to where they want to be. And it’s also a great journaling exercise for your own self-care and visioning.
Affirmative writing is where we write to bridge the gap between our current reality and our desired outcome, whether it’s events, goals, feelings, situations or something else. We write as if these things are already so – including our feeling state. Tip: Feelings are the magnet when it Read More…
We live in a society that believes that facts, science and rationality will solve all our problems, but we ALL live with minds that are ruled by feelings and emotions. How many times have you watched a client, friend or loved one do something that’s clearly going to cause them difficulty later on?
Whatever kind of coaching you do – even business, career and executive coaching – it’s feelings that get in the way. And the more hidden the feelings and emotions are – the more likely they are to trip our clients up. So if you have a stuck Read More…
Limiting beliefs are often so much a part of us that we don’t even realise they’re there. In fact, asking a client what their limiting beliefs are could be likened to the metaphor of asking a fish for a glass of water: It’s so much a part of them that they don’t see it.
When our clients are stuck, when they have a goal and are not making progress or when the client is keen, knows what the next step is but avoids or won’t commit to it – it’s often a limiting belief at work. So this is the Read More…
There are many, many different coaching models out there but I still haven’t found anything that beats the GROW model for simplicity, effectiveness and results. If you embrace the GROW model – your clients will love you and you’ll never lose track in a coaching session again.
So, you probably use the GROW model (or T-GROW) without even realizing it:
T – Topic (Session Topic) G – Goal (Session Goal) R – Reality (Where they are and what’s going on for them) O – Options (Ideas and brainstorming – what they COULD do to move forwards) W – Read More…
Do you have a client who always blames someone else, who seems to create drama wherever they go or who finds it hard to take responsibility for their role in situations? If so, the simple coaching metaphor of “Pick up the Mirror, not the Magnifying Glass” could help you.
When things go ‘wrong’ it’s very human to want to assign blame – we think this helps us understand what happened and move forwards. And who doesn’t feel better ‘knowing’ the cause – especially if it’s someone else!
But in reality, although assigning blame helps us feel better, it also prevents Read More…
The subtitle of this book really says it all: “Let go of who you think you’re supposed to be and embrace who you are.”
Brene Brown has a Ph.D. She’s a researcher and academic in the realms of emotion, shame and authenticity. And while the author presents 10 guideposts to living what she calls “a wholehearted life”, she illustrates each with personal examples from her own journey. So it’s also a memoir, the author’s very personal story of coming to terms with being herself. And as she struggles with her own lack of worthiness and shame, she turns a Read More…
Rejection is utterly unavoidable in life. So why do people spend so much time and energy trying?
Well, it hurts of course! But it doesn’t need to… In order to minimize the pain of rejection, we can help our clients find a way to avoid taking rejections personally.
Here are 10 of my Top Tips to help your clients handle rejection:
There isn’t a “Handle Rejection” strategy that works for everyone in all circumstances. Each circumstance is unique – so help your clients find time for reflection, self-compassion and learning. Fearless repetition! Help your clients learn to think like Read More…
Rejection is painful for many of us. And it can be even more painful when it’s something we worked hard towards or really, really wanted. And that makes it even more important that we learn from our rejections. If it’s something important to us, if we truly did our best, or are getting rejected repeatedly we need to ask why we got turned down.
Apart from the obvious learning we get from feedback, think about this: “No” does not necessarily mean “No FOREVER”! A “No” may become a “Yes” under certain conditions – but for this to happen we Read More…
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