Home » Coaching Blog » Common Coaching Topics » Confidence » Coaching Tools 101: Boost Confidence with this Easy, Fun "Role Model" Coaching Exercise! Coaching Tools 101: Boost Confidence with this Easy, Fun "Role Model" Coaching Exercise! Last Updated: January 15, 2024 Reading Time: 6 min Emma-Louise ShareTweet4SharePin105109 Shares In this article you'll find a step-by-step guide to the role model confidence boosting exercising. In addition, you'll learn how you can use this coaching tool in a group or workshop, plus a super-quick version of this exercise and some fun follow-on homework ideas! What's in this Coaching Tool Guide This guide to the Role Model Confidence Boosting Exercise will take you through: The Idea behind this Confidence Exercise About The Role Model Confidence Boosting Exercise Steps to Use this Confidence Boosting Exercise How to use this Exercise in a Workshop Fun Follow-on Homework Ideas Quick Version of this Exercise: An Instant Confidence Boost! Wrap-up You may also like The Idea behind the Role Model Confidence Boosting Exercise Our Role Models can be Confidence Boosters! This article uses our role models to develop confidence. It explores the idea that we have the capacity for whatever qualities and behaviours we observe in others: while you may not (yet) have those skills, the fact that you recognize them in someone else means you have the potential to develop them in yourself. This idea is usually used in a negative way Has anyone ever said to you something like: "Takes one to know one." "When you say negative things about others, it reveals who you really are." "What annoys you in others, is what you're denying in yourself." Well, there is truth to these statements—although sadly, statements like these are usually meant as a "put down" or to shame us! And yet, pondering what we dislike in others can be a useful inquiry for us to investigate our "shadow" side. Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves. Carl Jung And the role model tool takes this idea and uses it in a positive way! If what we see in others is a reflection of what is in ourselves, then surely that works both ways? So, here is a positive take on this idea. If the qualities we see in others is some denied or undeveloped aspect of ourselves, then surely that must also apply to all the 'good' stuff we recognize in others? And that's the basis of this wonderful confidence boosting exercise I'm about to share with you. All those good skills or qualities we admire in our role models just need recognizing within ourselves and consciously developing. So, who are your role models? Who inspires you? Who do you admire and look up to? Because whether it's their energy, communication skills, aura of confidence, leadership or something else—if you can see it, you can learn to do it! About The Role Model Confidence Boosting Exercise This simple coaching exercise will help your clients move closer to embodying the personal qualities they admire in others, and boost their confidence as you help them realize they already have the seed for those qualities within themselves. When to use this coaching exercise While you can do this exercise as part of a coaching session, it also makes great individual homework (and is best when you review the results with your client at the next session). It is also makes a fabulous workshop, webinar or group coaching exercise. Who to use this coaching exercise with This exercise can be used any time to help boost a client's confidence or to help them develop skills they need to achieve goals or solve problems. Adapt and use this exercise with your career coaching clients, with youth, executive and leadership coaching clients as well as in stress management and confidence-boosting situations! Resources Needed You can use our done-for-you Role Model Confidence Boosting Tool, or simply use the questions below plus pen and paper! Imagination! Pen & Paper Role Model Confidence Boosting ExerciseIndividual Tool Boost your client’s confidence with this inspirational life coaching exercise to help your client develop qualities they admire! (1 pages) Also Available In: Self-Discovery ToolkitAdd to cart $9.95 Brandable Steps to Use The Role Model Confidence Boosting Exercise STEP 1: Identify 3 Role Models Ask your client, "Who are your Top 3 Role Models?", "Who do you admire?", "Who impresses you?" NOTE: They can be real or in your imagination, someone you know or don't, in a film or book, alive or dead! ______________________ ______________________ ______________________ STEP 2: Identify 2 People Who Have Influenced You Recently Ask your client, "Who has been most influential in your life over the last year, personally, and in your career?" Personally ______________________ In your career ______________________ STEP 3: What About Them Impacted You Most? Ask your client to consider and write down: What about these 5 people has impacted you? What do you most admire about your role models above and why? What could you learn from them? STEP 4: What Qualities Would You Like to Have for Yourself? Next, ask your client to make a list if the qualities that you would like to emulate or have for yourself. List as many as you can think of! ______________________ ______________________ ______________________ ______________________ ______________________ STEP 5: Brainstorm How You Could Bring Some of those Qualities into Your Life FIRST share the idea: You can only see in others what you have the capacity for in yourself. This means that you already have - or can develop - this quality! THEN ask your client to write out 5 ways you could begin to bring some of those qualities into their everyday life. TIPS: How could you adapt what your role models do to fit you and your life? How could you take that quality and embody it more in your life? ______________________ ______________________ ______________________ ______________________ ______________________ STEP 6: Choose at least ONE Action! To wrap up, what one specific action will you choose to move forwards with? ______________________ What other action steps could you take? _____________________ How to use this Confidence Boosting Exercise in a Workshop Allow: 45 minutes Resources needed: Paper (or our done-for-you Role Model Coaching Exercise) and Pens for Attendees. Flipchart or Whiteboard and pens for you. Let people know you're going to do a fun exercise with them - to boost confidence! (allow 1-2 mins) Use Step 1 as a group warm-up - get people to shout out names of people they admire (allow 5 mins). Write them down on the Flipchart. Steps 2 and 3 work well when done individually, for maximum introspection (allow 5 mins). Step 4 is great for discussion in groups of 3-4 people. Once the group time is up, ask someone from each group to share some of the top qualities people were looking for (allow 8-10 mins, plus 3-5 mins for the group sharing piece - time depends on numbers of people). Write them down on the Flipchart. Introduce the CORE Idea of this tool (1-2 mins). Then put people into pairs for Step 5 (allow 8-10 mins). You can wrap up using Step 6, and ask all workshop attendees to share the one specific action they will move forwards with (allow 5 mins). The Takeaway: Share the quick version of this exercise outlined below (allow 1-2 mins) Fun Follow-on Homework Ideas Suggest to your client that they: Read books, memoirs, autobiographies of people they look up to. They can also watch/listen to podcasts, radio, films and documentaries about the people they admire. Finally, they can journal about the qualities they admire in others and would like to grow in their lives. Example questions to explore include; where have they already used this quality in their life? Where do they hold themselves back? What would life (or a specific situation) look like if they fully embraced their capacity for this quality? How would it FEEL to embrace this quality? What excites them, what scares them? These ideas will give clients plenty of inspiration to grow! Quick Version of this Exercise: An Instant Confidence Boost! Once you or your clients have done this exercise, you can do a super-abbreviated version of this exercise for an instant confidence boost. Here it is: Next time you notice yourself admiring someone remind yourself: The fact that I'm noticing this means I have the capacity for this too. Take a moment to absorb that. You could be/do/have that quality or skill too—if you tried or wanted to! OPTIONAL EXTRA: Ask yourself: "What could I do to develop or demonstrate this quality more in my life?" Wrap-up This exercise is so simple, yet so powerful! Simply explore what you (or your clients) admire in others, acknowledge you have the capacity for that quality yourself, and then commit to taking steps to develop it. I recommend you use this exercise on yourself before using it with a client. That way you'll understand its power, and get ideas of how to go deeper with your clients. Tip: You can use it with children too—a simple reminder they can carry with them throughout life that we are much more capable than we might at first think! I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence but it comes from within. Anonymous Role Model Confidence Boosting ExerciseIndividual Tool Boost your client’s confidence with this inspirational life coaching exercise to help your client develop qualities they admire! (1 pages) Also Available In: Self-Discovery ToolkitAdd to cart $9.95 Brandable Find this exercise plus 7 other great tools in our Self-Discovery Toolkit: Self-Discovery ToolkitValue Pack of Coaching Tools The coaching tools in this toolkit help your clients explore, discover and connect to their authentic selves—aligning with who they really are! See the 9 products included >> Also Available In: Coaching Tools & Exercises MEGAPack!Add to cart $59.00 Brandable Liked this article all about a great confidence boosting coaching exercise? You may also like: Our Done-for-you Role Model Confidence Boosting Exercise Boost Your Self-Confidence with These 7 Easy Tips (Infographic) What Do You Need To Believe Right Now to be a Fabulous Coach? By Ruby McGuire Lastly, for more about coaching tools, see our Complete Guide to Coaching Tools! Do You Love Coaching Questions? As well as articles like these, get 549 powerful coaching questions as your gift with newsletter sign-up! Name:*Email:* PhoneThis field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged. Δ Join our popular weekly newsletter to get your gift plus 4 more monthly free coaching tools. Contributing Author: Emma-Louise Elsey is passionate about kindness, coaching and personal development and has been coaching since 2003. She's the Founder and Former CEO of The Coaching Tools Company, and Founder of Fierce Kindness. Originally a project and relationship manager for Fortune 500 companies she loves to create coaching tools and exercises, including lots of free coaching tools for you here at The Coaching Tools Company. Through Fierce Kindness she helps people create a life they love, make a difference and learn to be kind to themselves. She'd love you to sign-up for the Fierce Kindness Newsletter and grab a free How to Be Kind to Yourself Workbook. Or connect personally on Linkedin, Facebook or Instagram. Learn more about Emma-Louise & see all their articles here >> Categories: Coaching Ideas & Inspiration, Coaching Tips, Coaching Tools 101, Coaching Tools for Workshops, Confidence, Homework Ideas, How to Use Coaching Tools Image of Confident Client standing in office by Southworks via Shutterstock Image of Supergirl for Confidence Boosting Exercise against blue sky by Sunny Studio via Shutterstock 6 Comments Uneeda O Brewer June 24, 2019 Thank you for sharing these coaching tools. I can hardly wait to use them. All the best to you! Reply Emma-Louise June 25, 2019 Dear Uneeda, I'm so glad you're excited about this coaching exercise! Awesome! Warmly, Emma-Louise Reply Dr. Djagri T. April 25, 2022 Valuable material for me as a beginner. Thank you very much for such generosity. You made available many free coaching resources which are far enough to build a coaching business. Dr. Mabandine Djagri T. Reply Michela Phillips April 26, 2022 So glad you find the free resources helpful for your business! Thank you for your support 🙂 - Kindly, Michela Reply oumaima May 11, 2022 Thank you for these resources. Very kind of you to share them for free Reply Michela Phillips May 11, 2022 So glad you enjoy the resources 🙂 - Kindly, Michela Reply Leave a Reply Cancel ReplyYour email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Δ
Uneeda O Brewer June 24, 2019 Thank you for sharing these coaching tools. I can hardly wait to use them. All the best to you! Reply
Emma-Louise June 25, 2019 Dear Uneeda, I'm so glad you're excited about this coaching exercise! Awesome! Warmly, Emma-Louise Reply
Dr. Djagri T. April 25, 2022 Valuable material for me as a beginner. Thank you very much for such generosity. You made available many free coaching resources which are far enough to build a coaching business. Dr. Mabandine Djagri T. Reply
Michela Phillips April 26, 2022 So glad you find the free resources helpful for your business! Thank you for your support 🙂 - Kindly, Michela Reply