One Powerful Way to Wrap up a Coaching Session…

Over the years I have asked the same question to wrap-up a coaching session.

The answers vary significantly from client to client and from week to week - and I learned long ago not to try and second-guess their response. For example, sometimes I thought there had been a powerful realisation or Aha moment and they wouldn't mention it at all. And then sometimes I would feel that the session hadn't gone that well and they would say something huge like, "I realised it's OK to be who I am!"

The question? Simply, "What was your biggest win of the  session today?"

Do you ask something like this at the end of your sessions? In a way it's a bit like giving a gift to your client at the end of the session - here are just a few responses I have had to this question:

  • Recognizing how resistant I am to my own happiness!
  • Talking aloud, confirming the route I have chosen, realising I didn't need the confirmation I was looking for from others.
  • Having a plan, realising it's achievable in smaller steps!
  • Getting clarity on where I'm at - and what I need to do!
  • Realising that being kind can sometimes mean being tough and saying no.
  • The feeling of spaciousness around my goals.
  • I no longer feel like I'm floating/drowning - I feel recharged and stronger.
  • Realising I am not alone - that other people feel this way.

And as well as helping the client, I have learned many things by asking this question. For example, I learned (time and again!) not to judge my coaching 'performance'. And through noticing the patterns and themes to the answers over the years I have learned what people really value about coaching - and about me as a coach.

You may have noticed that the question is deliberately phrased to suggest there were many wins - but it asks the client to decide what was most valuable to them. It's a great way for the client to evaluate their coaching experience, look for the positive, clarify what they've learned and affirm themselves. It also helps us as coaches get a sense of what our clients most need from us - and what our own strengths are!

Tip: Sometimes I additionally ask, "And what's so special about that for you?" This helps take a response like "Deciding to book the flights" to "I gave myself permission to plan and put myself first." Whilst deciding to book the flights was the 'win', there had also been a big shift in how they saw themselves. When we reflect this back to the client - it helps the client to access their own inner wisdom and cement their learning.

I'd love to hear what you do/ask to wrap up a session, so please comment below and share your thoughts!

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7 Comments

  1. Caroline

    I have been using this end to the session for a few months now and I'm always surprised by the answer. It's never what I was expecting

    Reply
  2. Gauri

    Dear Emma....

    I Just Love your posts and I thank you deeply for being an enormously helpful resource for coaches.

    Cheers

    Reply
    • Emma-Louise

      Dear Gauri, thank-you so much for your kind words. I am so glad you find this website helpful! Keep up all YOUR good work. Warmly, Emma-Louise

      Reply
  3. wendy

    I ask the question. "What did you learn from today's session?" And, "How would that make a difference in ?" *the situation refers to the area of coaching that the coachee is seeking.
    And sometimes I ask this question as well, "What do you look forward to?"

    Reply

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